What Was True

Driving, around in your car,

We’d speak about us,

But never get far.

Laying, together in your bed,

I’d ask if you cared.

Not knowing where that led.

Standing, in front of you,

Couldn’t meet your gaze.

Couldn’t tell what was true.

Now, we don’t drive in your car.

We don’t lay in your bed.

I am not in front of you.

I know what is true.

How many nights have I spent
Trying to stop that inevitable fall
How many minutes have I wasted
Looking back on it all
We were once whole, and okay
We were once able to see through a day
Without balking what needed to be
Without hating what we couldn’t see
I can’t resist forgetting you
I can’t forget resisting you
I’m confused; oh but really I’m not
I’m simply out of my mind
I’m always in some bind
Of a kind
I’ll say nothing at all
I’ll wake after the fall
As do we all
Will I be aware
That you’re there?
More than likely
But I guess
That was what I’ve always known
In my heart of hearts
In my way of ways
What am I even getting at
Oh you’ll see
I’m always trying to breathe
And feel
Something which was never real
Was it? Wasn’t it? Is it?
I can never tell
Afraid this is ending
Here’s the message I’m sending
I’ve had enough
I’m feeble, not tough
But not truly weak either
My back’s turned to the wall
And I’m starting to hear it all
Just make it stop
Take me away
Into any other day
And keep me there to stay
I won’t spend my nights like this any longer